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Marriage Help - Adoration PDF Print E-mail
Written by Min Zhu   
Tuesday, 25 December 2007

Marriage Help - Adoration 

Adore your Mate


Beyond  telling your  mate  that  you  love  them,  that  they  are  special,  and  having
passion in your relationship, you should adore your mate and what they bring into
the relationship.  What that means is to appreciate and love them for the person
they are, faults and all.  This is true devotion to your mate and demonstration that
you do not take them for granted.

Follow Your Instincts


When things are going in a wrong direction, often people will simply keep going in
the  same  direction  while  hoping  that things  work themselves  out.   The  result  is
usually negative.  Instead, listen to your gut feelings, your inner instincts.  If you
believe that something is bothering your mate or not right in your relationship, keep
it between you and your mate and work things out as a couple.


Be Creative


The words, ?I love you,? are always welcomed but why not add some creativity to
the way you tell your mate you love them.  Rent a billboard in a location where you
know your mate drives every day that clearly says, ?I love you,? request that your
mate?s radio station play a special song and message on his or her way to work, or
if celebrating a special anniversary, have a skywriter fly by a ball stadium, park, or
somewhere special where you are spending quality time together outdoors.


Make Eye Contact


You may not think this is important, but think back to the first time you saw your
now mate.  More than likely, the first interaction was through eye contact.  If you
are  having  dinner  during  the  holidays  with  a  large  group  of  family  and  friends,
glance over to your mate and give them a seductive wink, or if your mate is giving
a  speech  and  you  are  there  to  offer  support,  attentively  look  at  them,  making
directly eye contact and offer a warm reassuring smile.  Eyes can say a lot!


Learn More about Your Mate


Either find a good questionnaire or create one that does not dig up the past, but
focuses  on  discovering  other  qualities  about  each  other.   One  happily  married
couple did this and the wife, who had been standing by her husband for more than
10  years,  discovered  that  he  used  to  be  a  competitive  ice  skater.   She  had  no
idea.  Guess what they did on Saturday?


Change Routines


Understand that every once in a while, it is important to throw an exciting curve
into your relationship.  If you are in a routine for example of offering your mate a
quick peck on the lips before you part ways for the day, try adding a soft, gentle
kiss on the  neck.  You can be assured  that throughout  the  day, that  change in
routine, is what will be on your mate?s mind.


Dance


Finding a nice place where the two of you can enjoy a slow dance is a great way to
spend time together, holding each other without saying a word.  Keep in mind that
to accomplish this, you can stay home and simply move some furniture out of the
way, light some candles, and put on your favorite soft music and enjoy some quiet,
romantic time together.


Sunrise/Sunset


Too often people miss the beautiful miracle of a sunrise or sunset.  Schedule time
to get up early one morning with a thermos of hot coffee or cappuccino and find a
quiet  place  where  the  two  of  you  can  go  just  to  watch  the  sun  rise  or  set.
Appreciate what nature has to offer and share it with each other.


Explorations


Find something they you are both interested in exploring and do it together.  For
example,  if  you  live  in  a  place  where  there  are  caves,  make  a  day  of  driving
around  and  exploring  caves.   Be  sure  to  take  the  right  equipment  and  safety
precautions  but  this  puts  you  both  in  a  position  of  trusting  each  other  and
discovering something new and exciting together.
 


To Tell or Not to Tell


Experts  will  disagree  on  how  much  of  a  person?s  past  should  be  shared  in  a
relationship and while some things probably should be shared, most people lean
more to not sharing every aspect of the past.  First, it is the past.  Think back to
how  much  people  grow  through  the  teen  years  to  mid-twenties.       Offering
unnecessary information from the past is a great way to create distrust, insecurity,
and more questions than answers.  Be wise when sharing.




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Last Updated ( Wednesday, 26 December 2007 )
 
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